Oscar Race: The 30 Acting Performances of 2013 PART 2!

Let’s Talk About Saving Mr. Banks

15. Emma Thompson – Saving Mr. Banks – Josh’s Wild Card Best Actress – Without any further ado lets jump right into part 2 of the top 30 performances of 2013 by talking about possibly the biggest snub of the year. Thompson gives one of the best performances of her long and storied career; as P.L. Travers Thompson finds a way to make one of the harshest and unforgivingly strict authors of all time and make her relatable and downright likable at times. We understand why Travers is the way she is through the eyes of Thompson. This film is one of the more touching and wonderful films of the year and it mainly hang on the shoulders of Thompson, a great performance from a great film and possibly the greatest family film of the year.

14. Colin Ferrell – Saving Mr. Banks – Josh’s Wild Card Best Supporting Actor – I’m as shocked as anyone that Ferrell is on this list. It was only last summer when I openly stated that he was a “film ruiner”, but shocker of all shockers here he is. He plays a character unlike anything I’ve seen him play before and really gives it his all. I’d love to see more performances like this one in Ferrell future; well rounded, fully formed and full of heart these are the characters I want more of.

The Cream of the Crop – A moment to discuss these next few performances as whole, they are called the cream of the crop because that’s exactly what they are, every choice was very difficult and all in all, all of them deserves an award but there can only be one…. highlander.

13. Michael Fassbender – 12 Years a Slave – Best Supporting Actor – Fassbender is amazing, he’s a star on the rise and an amazing actor to boot. As a vicious and borderline sociopathic salve owner Fassbender is brutal. He completely gives in to the character and the part, and is beyond fantastic in this role. The difficult part about this performance is Fassbender’s character is such a terrible, awful, gross human being that’s hard to really say that you enjoy watching him. So very good, so very talented, so very hard to watch.

12. Chiwetel Ejiofor – 12 Years a Slave – Best Actor – Speaking of hard to watch, Ejiofor is nearly perfect as Solomon Northup which is what makes 12 Years a Slave so difficult to watch. I’ve seen it twice, I’m not sure if I want to watch it again. Northup is such a good man in the worst situation imaginable, he manages to show the characters strength through his stoic and subdued nature; which is a masterful feat. If we didn’t care for Solomon then we wouldn’t connect with this film at all.

11. Lupita Nyong’o – 12 Years a Slave –Best Supporting Actress – In terms of acting Nyong’o is the brightest of all the bright spots in 12 Years a Slave, that being said… awwww… crushing… soul dead… ughhh… Nyong’o kills me; you can’t help but feel for this woman as she deals with life. A life no one should have to live. Nyong’o plays this character with the innocents and strength and is simply spectacular.    

The One Where Josh’s Cheats Because it’s his Article and He Can Do What He Wants.

10. Melonie Diaz, Michael B. Jordan, Octavia Spencer – Fruitvale Station – Josh’s Wild Card Best Ensemble – The top 10 is starting with the best ensemble of the year, in one of the most overlooked films of the year. Fruitvale Station was the very early frontrunner of the awards season, sadly due to Hollywood politics and summer release date Fruitvale became lost in the shuffle. Even in this very strong year of lead acting performances, Michael B. Jordan deserves a spot in the final five nominees. On top of that, Melonie Diaz and Octavia Spencer could easily replace Streep and Roberts but sadly their names are not famous enough. This is the first film that made cry this year and one of the most moving and emotional films of the year, and a lot, A LOT, of that is because of this cast. If I had to pick one above the rest it would be Spencer as the matriarch of this family, but everyone is fantastic really showing the layers and depth of everyone in this story. Showing how people are not all good and not all bad, but that people are people and should be respected for that fact alone, Diaz, Jordan, Spencer and Fruitvale Station make a fantastic film from start to finish.

Let’s Talk About Excess

9. Leonardo DiCaprio – The Wolf of Wall Street – Best Actor – If you don’t see DiCaprio’s greatness in this film, you are blind. As fraudulent Wall Street broker Jordan Belfort DiCaprio is at some points comedian, some points scary sociopath and other points satirical mastermind. Never, never are you rooting for Belfort but you can empathies with what he’s striving for. This has been a controversial performance in a very controversial film (which is why I think DiCaprio will go home Oscar less, again.) What make this controversial is the accusation that The Wolf of Wall Street glorifies Belfort’s action, I say it indicts them. This is a moralistic tale and DiCaprio and director Martin Scorsese are pointing out the flaws and pitfalls of this terrible “bro” lifestyle. It’s really not their fault if bros idealize the character for the wrong reasons.

8. James Franco – Spring Breakers – Josh Wild Card’s Best Supporting Actor – The most polarizing film of the year. Even after several months and repeated views I still don’t know if Spring Breakers is good or bad, but I do know that James Franco as Alien is a genius. Alien is the embodiment of everything that is wrong with the American Dream version of spring break. But Franco losses himself in Alien and you totally forget that you are watching Franco. Taking many lines and scenes that would fall flat (or be borderline psychotic) and making them work to the nth degree. Franco is the reason to watch this film and should be nominated for supporting actor; in fact he should be the winner. I’d easily kick Cooper out of the category to put Franco in.  

The Extremely Amazing

7. Adele Exarchopoulous – Blue is the Warmest Color – Josh’s Wild Card Best Actress – A newcomer with something to prove. You may not know her name but Adele Exarchopoulous is someone who should be on American radars very soon. She gives and epic performance in an epic tale of discovering yourself. Following the character from ages 17-27 Blue is the Warmest Color is an amazing work film and work of art. Yes, the film is three hours long, but it needs every moment. I love what Adele brings to her character of the same name, she finds so many moments that fill you with joy, fill you with hope, fill you with pain, and fill you with despair. This character so perfectly encapsulates everything that this time in your life is about and Adele Exarchopoulous is perfection in this role.

6. Bruce Dern – Nebraska – Best Actor – As American as Apple Pie, Baseball, and Chevy, that’s Bruce Dern. Dern’s Woody Grant is a man with nothing lose as he goes on an adventure to find one million dollars. This is a story of fathers and sons and is one of the most touching and moving films of the year. A lot of that is Dern, he is ever-present in his portrayal of a man with dementia, who is reliving his past and sharing his life for the first time with his son. Dern knocks it out of the park with this role.   

5. Oscar Issac—Inside Llewyn Davis – Josh’s Wild Card Best Supporting Actor – Layered, emotional, driven, complex, believable, organic, melancholy, surreal, transcend, flawed, dark, funny, enigmatic, exhilarating and irresistible are all words to describe the over the moon amazing performance given by Oscar Issac at the title character of The Coen’s latest film. I have endless love and endless admiration for this performance. Truth be told, if I didn’t put the top four as my Oscar picks this would be number one.

The Group Known as the Best of the Best

            With this group there is specifically one from each category and the person who I would give the Academy Award to, if I had a vote. Based on who was nominated.

4. Judi Dench – Philomena – Best Actress – It is not a bold choice to say that Judi Dench is amazing and gives the best lead actress performance of the year. But she does, Dench is great in this role because she is playing a character I’ve never seen her play before. She shy and timid, firmly entrenched in the old world and old points of view. She’s sweet to an extreme and caring about all things and all people. As Philomena she makes the film work and her and co-star Steve Coogan are a dynamic team. Dench is wonderful and if she’s pulls the upset this weekend, I’d be thrilled.

3. Jared Letto – Dallas Buyers Club – Best Supporting Actor – Letto is a weirdo, Letto is also amazing as Reyon in Dallas Buyers Club. What makes this film work is the performances and how much you can connect to them. I was shocked with how much I enjoyed Letto in this film. A simple performance, played right at every note, and dealing with a hot button political issue in very good film with a very good performance is going to be more than enough for Letto to take home this award.   

2. Jennifer Lawrence – American Hustle – Best Supporting Actress – I’m in love with America’s new sweetheart Jennifer Lawrence, and I’m not alone in this. Lawrence delivers the only true great thing in American Hustle, she’s honest and funny and heartfelt and crazy and a real human in a hyper stylized world. I’m banking on the fact that Lawrence will win back to back Oscars and continue down her path to take over Hollywood. She’s awesome, there’s nothing more to say about her.  

And now for Number 1!!!

The Year of McConaughey            

1. Matthew McConaughey – Dallas Buyers Club – Best Actor – Alright, alright, alright! McConaughey has brilliantly maneuvered his career back on track and 2013 is the culmination of all of his efforts. He’s a giant film star now taking roles that challenge him and show off his crazy skills. From Mud to The Wolf of Wall Street to Dallas Buyers Club McConaughey could have been nominated three times this year. In Dallas Buyers Club he shows us a completely transformative performance (and I don’t mean his weight loss) but we get to see a character challenge his ideals or what is right and what is wrong, he never shies away from any moment and never betrays his character. I would be shocked and more than a little disappointed if Mr. McConaughey doesn’t walk home with an award.

The 30 Acting Performances of 2013 PART 1!

Year two of counting down the top 30 performances of the year and I am very excited for this year’s list because it’ been a very, very strong year for acting in general. Of course there are some mistaken nominations this year and we will get into that, and that’s why I’ve got my wild cards, so I can discuss the performances that have been overlooked.  

Just like last year, the top 4 spots are reserved for my picks on who will win the Academy Award this year, one from each category (Best Actor, Actress, Supporting Actress, and Supporting Actor)

Why 30?

Because we are combining combination of all of the acting categories: Best Actor & Actress and Best Supporting Actor & Actress. Already done the math? Realize that I’m 10 performances over? Well the other 10 are going to what I call wild card performances, these are performances from actors who have not been nominated for an academy award but I believe that they should be. 

What are elements that I look for in a good performance?

·        

     Character Development – is the character fully developed with a clear history that effects how the character moves, acts, thinks, feels and reacts to the currently situation. Is the character progressing through the story, is their performance layered, show depth and continuing in a logical path.

·      

            Relationships – are the relationships clear and consistent with every character they interact with.

·         Believably – do we believe the actor in the part? Am I looking at the character in the story or at the actor on the screen? It should be the former not the latter. Does the actor use all available tools (voice, body and mind) to create a brand new and unique character?

·         Interpretation – what did the actor bring to the character? Did he make proper choices for the character? Does the character feel organic or forced? Did the actor take appropriate risks? Could you see anyone else playing the character?

·         Objective – dose the actor understand the goals and objectives of the character in every moment and every scene?

·         Progression – does the actor understand and portray the arch, story and development of the character? Are they on point in every moment on screen? An actor is a storyteller, are they telling me the story.

30-16 Acting Performances of 2013

The Three Who Doesn’t Belong

            

30. Meryl Streep – August: Osage County – Best Actress – Why is she on this list this year? Because she’s Meryl Freaking Streep. This is sadly the second Streep nomination in a row that I just simply don’t agree with. She’s a great actress, but we need to actually watch what she’s doing not just award her for gracing us with her presents on screen. It’s a great part, in a great play; but on film August: Osage County falls very flat as does this performance.

29. Julia Roberts – August: Osage County – Best Supporting Actress – Read above… She’s here for name value and Oscar night ratings. A showy performance in overall pretty poor film full of showy performances

28. Christian Bale – American Hustle – Best Actor – I have a long storied history with thinking that Mr. Bale is quite overrated. I think he’s a very good actor, and his win for The Fighter is more than well deserved, but quite frankly I’m not sure what’s with the crazy Bale love (or the crazy love for American Hustle), sure he’s Batman, but he wasn’t a very good one. In a year that was marked by several insanely good leading acting performances Bale didn’t deserve to be in the category, he’s good, he’s very good, in most years he would be higher on this list but 2014 is far too good for this nonsense.

The Two That Other People Like

27. Bradley Cooper – American Hustle – Best Supporting Actor – This is not so much an indictment of Cooper, who is more than adequate in American Hustle, as much as the film itself. If Oscar night features a ton of wins for Hustle I’m going to be one sad film critic. Cooper is one of the most enjoyable parts of the film, but not enough for him crack my top 25 and again he’d miss my list completely if it wasn’t for his nomination.

26. Cate Blanchett – Blue Jasmine – Best Actress – Can I say anything bad about Blanchett in this role? No. Can I say that I enjoyed this role? No. Blue Jasmine fits right in with Woody Allen’s other recent films and is very well made. Blanchett is the star of this film, she’s what makes it work, her character is entitled, self-centered, ego driven and a just plain awful person. What makes this hard to watch is that her character grates on you at every moment and to top it off her character arc is very small, if it exists at all. Blanchett is very good at playing a very terrible person; it’s just hard to watch when she’s the focus of film. If I was betting on the Oscars Blanchett would be my bet to win, but for me it’s a very difficult performance to watch.

The Very Good But Not Flashy      

25. Sally Hawkins – Blue Jasmine -- Best Supporting Actress – I may be the only person to put Hawkins of Blanchett for Blue Jasmine but Hawkins plays a character like I’ve never seen her play before. She pulls off a true middle class American, with heart and soul, kindness and caring, depth and layers (and considering she’s British, that’s an accomplishment).  Hawkins is understated and very good, she’s makes Allen’s script shine and make the film enjoyable.

24. June Squibb – Nebraska – Best Supporting Actress – The definition of a firecracker is June Squibb in Nebraska, she’s wonderful and strong. Squibb has very little screen time and she shines when she’s on the screen. Squibb is a hidden gem of an actress, giving a hidden gem of a performance. Happy to see her nominated.

23. Barkhad Abdi – Captain Phillips – Best Supporting Actor – “I’m the captain now” is probably the most quotable line of the year. Abdi came out of nowhere this year to become a true dark horse in the Supporting Actor race. Abdi is very strong and holds his own opposite mega star Tom Hanks (who was robbed this year from an Oscar nomination for this film or Saving Mr. Banks). But, yet, it’s Abdi who is representing Captain Phillips this year and it’s more than deservedly so. Abdi plays the leader of his Somali pirate crew and allows us to see why he’s doing what he’s doing, what is the reason behind his action, and at points we actually care for this true to life pirate captain.

22. Sam Rockwell – The Way Way Back – Josh’s Wild Card Best Supporting Actor – Alright, this is my first wild card spot and I dedicate this one to Rockwell. It’s not surprising that Rockwell is great, he’s great more often than not, but what is surprising is his soulful and youthful take on this slacker owner of a waterpark. The character could come off as stale and clichéd but in the hands of Rockwell the character becomes the emotional center of the film. The Way Way Back was a small summer hit and if you missed it find a way to see it this winter on DVD.  

21. Amy Acker – Much Ado About Nothing – Josh’s Wild Card Best Supporting Actress – Speaking of small summer hits, Joss Whedon followed the biggest hit of last year with a small black and white adaptation of Shakespeare’s Much Ado About Nothing. This script always hangs on the relationship between Benedict and Beatrice played skillfully by Alexis Denisof and Amy Amy Acker, respectively. Acker steals this film, she is simply breathtaking in the role, subtle yet strong a true independent woman. I hope this opens up her career allows her to shine more often.  

The Very Good But Too Flashy

20. Jonah Hill – The Wolf of Wall Street – Best Supporting Actor – It’s good to see Hill taking time to make films like these. He’s a great actor and is allowed to shine here. Yes, he’s one of the comedic relief elements of the film, but hangs in with star Leo DiCaprio in every scene. The film is about excess and Hill’s character personifies that. He shows that he can play it straight while in a big broad film and proving that he deserves his spot in the Hollywood hierarchy.    

19. Amy Adams –American Hustle – Best Actress– Getting back to American Hustle Adams is a deserved nominee from this film. She holds what little plot there is together, gives us an emotional and logical center that we can follow and a character that we can care for and root for, which is something you can’t say the men of American Hustle.

The Best of the Blockbusters

            18. Tom Hiddleston – Thor: The Dark World – Josh’s Wild Card Best Supporting Actor – its characters like these that will never get noticed, its performances like Hiddleston’s will never get noticed. Its characters like Loki that will be far more remembered then most characters on this list. It takes a lot to take a villain and turn him into a beloved film icon and that’s what Hiddleston has done. What allows him to do this? He’s a very talented actor who elevates a character to the next level. Giving the character depth, humor, reliability and likeability, Hiddleston is the star and steals every second of Thor: The Dark World that he’s in.        

           

17. Simon Pegg – The World’s End – Josh’s Wild Card Best Actor – Let us take a moment to bask in the glow how amazing Simon Pegg is an actor… we done basking? Good. Pegg is amazing and doesn’t get enough credit because he constantly acting in comedies and giant blockbusters, but in The World’s End he’s given a chance to really show what he can… in this sci-fi genre film… but still. He takes an archetype slacker character and fills it with hope, joy, feelings, depth and change. He’s the emotional drive of one of my favorite films of the year and a fantastic finish to Pegg, Nick Frost and Edgar Wright's trilogy.

          

  16. Sandra Bullock – Gravity –Best Actress – So Sandra Bullock already has an Academy Award but now she finally deserves one. Gravity is a feat, it’s a spectacular film and Bullock is one of the top reasons why. After years of being a star she finally proves that there is something really deep with in her that is worth watching. I have a theory that there is one perfect dramatic part out there for everyone, and Bullock found it. She is great in Gravity and deserves all the attention she is getting. About time she finally gives a performance to back up the credit she’s already been given.   

Come Back Tomorrow for numbers 15-1!

Oscar Season: The 6 Most Fun Film Experiences of 2013

           

 This is one of my favorite lists to compile each year because this is what film is supposed to be about, fun; a joyous, wonderful and memorable trip to the movies. Movies are an amazing communal experience, a story to get endlessly lost in and a great way to open your mind (at least when done right). Yes, it’s a commercial industry but there is real artistry and that’s when good films are made. Yet, there are times when a bad movie is made better by circumstance, theatre, timing and the great company you keep.

           Now let’s jump right into Nerd 5 Top 6 Most Fun Film Experiences of 2013

6. The Conjuring – Surprise, surprise as horror film makes the list of most fun film experiences, a horror film that I saw by myself nonetheless. Most of the horror fans that I know don’t care for this movie, which is probably why I love it. A great horror film, that tells the a story and uses it’s creepy elements for good, not for shock value. Maybe it’s low expectations that helped, but The Conjuring is a great film, full of interesting characters, a great mystery and fantastic visual styling’s. Director James Wan continues to prove why he’s a modern master of the horror genera and I’m excited to see what he does away from horror films with his next outing Fast and Furious 7.    

5. Fast & Furious 6 – Speaking of the Fast and Furious franchise, the 6^th installment comes in right here. A great time at the movies with my lady! This is probably the dumbest franchise in Hollywood right now, but man it’s endlessly fun, always entertaining and the just the right amount of self-aware. This film knows what it is and takes advantage of it at every turn, it’s ridiculous, illogical, and down-right insane; in most films that would be a bad thing, but it works here because everyone on screen is having such a good time it’s infectious. I mean come on, two sports cars take down a giant airplane on a never ending runway in this films climax and it’s the best thing I’ve seen since Fast 5. Hey everyone, remember when these films were actually about street racing?

4. The Hunger Games: Catching Fire – A great film, made even better by great company. Catching Fire is the best book of The Hunger Games series and will probably go down as the best film as well. It’s a great time at the movies with a little bit of message to boot. But there are times where the universe allows you to see a wonderful film with perfect company! My friends Marsha and Laura and I ventured into the theatre on opening weekend, surrounded by hardcore fans of the series, and had a marvelous time! Sometimes it’s the amazing people that make the amazing film, even better. Whether you are a member of a fandom or not there is nothing like seeing a film on opening weekend with those who are going to love it endlessly and always, try it, at least once. And Hunger Games fan enjoy the ride, because at some point the new films come to an end, take from a Potter fan who still longs for those days. But more importantly, enjoy Catching Fire

3. Hansel & Gretel Witch Hunters – Coming out in the dumping ground of February 2013; Hansel & Gretel Witch Hunters was exactly what we needed. Produced by Will Ferrell and Adam McKay, this fairy tale reimagining is very aware of it ridiculous nature, even to the point of satire at times. Now, it’s not genius but man this is crazy fun. Little did my buddy Max and I know what we were in for when we sat down to watch Hansel & Gretel take down some witches, that there was also steam punk weapons, crazy super powers  and trolls…. Yes trolls. Only a viewing of this comedic masterpiece, which never once tries to be a comedy, will let you truly know its greatness. Also props to Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton who give this script and film far more credence then it deserves.

2. World War Z – A great way to end a great day. I was lucky enough to see plenty of films this year with one of my best friends of all time and roommate Jeff. World War Z came as celebration of my entry into Seattle, we had just filmed our own zombie film, summer was in high gear and we sat down to watch this great summer blockbuster. Yes we were tired, yes we’d be with amazing folks all day, but the joy of sitting down to film at the end of a great is simply irresistible. World War Z might be the weakest film on this list, but it was one of the great moments of my year. Watching this film with a group of close friends is the way to go, enjoy its flaws and its greatness.  

1. Frozen – Sorry everyone, nothing is going to top watching Frozen with a couple of the coolest 4 year olds that I know. Again a great film (and my personal pick for best animated film of this year) made even better by the circumstances around it. Thanksgiving Day 2013 was a very fun day. It started with hanging with my family, a trip to the park, a wonderful meal then Uncle Josh loaded up his niece Rita and nephew Kyler and headed off to see the new Disney animated film. As great as kids films can be without kids, they are even better with them. We pulled up to the theatre and instantly this joy began with buying tickets from a former SHS student of mine, enjoying our popcorn and soda, running into several wonderful HomeLink families, enjoying this timeless and joyous film, the taking the new Frozen fans to get some hot chocolate after the film, where again was helped by a former student, then blasting “Let it go” in my car as we pulled up just in time for bed. I will always remember Rita telling me that “You know everyone!” as we pulled out of the Starbucks drive though. A wonderful memory.

Oscar Season: The 10 Worst Films of 2013

     

      I don’t like to be hater, but I can’t paint a complete picture of 2013 without talking about the bad, awful, and sometimes atrocious films of 2013. In a year that could go down as one of the greatest of all time, there has to be a flip side, and 2013 has been as bad as it was good.

            This list doesn’t include films that are so bad they are good because those would have actually been enjoyable at times. These are ten films to avoid. Most of them are long, unoriginal and flat out boring. Some appear on this because of expectations that were too high, some appear on this because they couldn’t help but be here, and some were destined to be here.

            And now Nerd 5 presents the 10 worst films of 2013

10. Pacific Rim – What happens when you give Guillermo del Toro complete control, an unlimited budget, and endless time to make a film? A poor excuse for a summer blockbuster, that’s what happens. In all of his freedom del Toro forgot the main thing that makes a quality film, a good script. If all you wanted was video-game-quality giant robots fighting the same endless fight that never escalates and delivers the same mind-numbing scenes on a two hour loop, then Pacific Rim is for you. If you even want the slightest bit of intelligence, character development, and original voice, look elsewhere. Pacific Rim is this year Avatar, an over hyped computer graphic demonstration with a lack of a story, at least Rim failed at the box office; looks like Atlantic Rim, Arctic Rim and Indian Rim won’t be hitting a theatre near you.  

9. Ender’s Game – Epic filmmaker Gavin Hood took control of a beloved book and burnt it to the ground. Still confused as to who Gavin Hood is? Director of X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Yup that guy got another shot a franchise. Ender’s Game missed the point completely and everyone on screen seemed like they were floating their way through the process. This film wasn’t helped by a tagline that gave away the ending. Adapting a book to film when done right can lead to many millions of dollars from the already built in fan base; adapting a book when done poorly is the fastest way to become one of the biggest bombs and a complete waste of non-existent digital film.

8. Free Birds – Two turkeys, one smart one dumb, must team up and travel to through time to take down the world’s biggest evil… Holidays??? Yeah. It’s a film about how Thanksgiving needs to be taken down. Contrary to popular commercial shopping belief, there is a holiday between Halloween and Christmas and Free Birds tried to bring it down! This film defines pandering nonsense; it panders to children for all the wrong reasons. Watch any of the other kids films that was released this year, even Planes is better than this dull piece of leftover turkey.   

7. The Heat – Most people loved this movie, it was hailed as funny, original, and one of the best comedies of the year; it’s actually appearing on some critics top 10 lists of year and all of this baffles me. 100% baffles me. I don’t get the joke. The Heat is not original (you want an original take on this premise, watch 21 Jump Street from 2012), it’s not funny (a sad attempt to make swearing and Boston cop cliché’s funny), and it’s one of the most overrated comedies of all time. The Heat quickly devolves into the same joke over and over and over again, the plot is hamfisted and predicable, and all in all The Heat is another failed attempt at getting Melisa McCarthy a star vehicle (I adore her, but this is a miserable attempt). I won’t be in line for The Heat 2: THE SAME JOKES STRIKE AGAIN!  

6. Tyler Perry’s Temptation – Does anyone except to Tyler Perry to make a good film? Honestly if you are a fan of Perry you have to want him to turn it around. His last few projects have tanked at box office and with critics. Temptation was his first of 4 films released into theatre’s this year (slow down Tyler, it’s not a race). Temptation felt like watching a really horribly put together adult film, minus all the X-rated material, add in Kim Kardashian. There’s too much going on for these very stereotypical characters to deal with and the actors are lost in every moment of the film, it’s filmed like a low end TV drama, and fails on every level. This film is the definition of horrible people doing horrible things to decent people and we are supposed to care about them for some reason, goodness Perry let’s move on.

5. Grown Up 2 – No one should be surprised that this is here. Grown Ups 2 is the yearly Adam Sandler suckfest. It’s clear that Sandler has no one on his team telling him “no.” Sandler can do whatever he wants, it’s sad that these films are what he chooses to do. There is nothing wrong with making a film with your friends. Honestly the idea of Grown Ups and Grown Ups 2 are not terrible, a group of friends catching up and finding out who they really are, with actors you like, in locations that are fun to look at, however it takes a good script and people who care about a project, Grown Ups 2 lacks both. If you like what Sandler has done the last 5 years then this is right up your alley, but I think even those few remaining Sandler fans will be disappointed with this junk… maybe he’s just making films for 3-year-olds now, they would enjoy Grown Ups 2.

4. Man of Steel – Another attempt to reboot the Superman franchise, sadly this time it worked. Man of Steel made more money than it ever should have. It also suffered from a steep decline in box office money. If you followed the arc of this film in theatres it’s clear that word of mouth killed a film that people were excited to see. People want a good Superman film; this is not a good superman film. Man of Steel is director Zack Snyder’s application to Hollywood’s next Michael Bay. This is as dumb as any Transformers film, and even more pointlessly violent, misguided at every turn, ignorant to the tradition of the characters, yet visually kind of pretty. The topper to all of this is that it’s dull, predicable, and insulting. Yet, because people flocked early to see this Snyder get helm the next film in this unfortunate franchise. Yippie! More terrible films, this time starring Ben Affleck as Batman…

3. Movie 43 – Coming out in 2013’s dumping ground (Jan & Feb), Movie 43 was missed by most people and be lucky that you did (I wish I had). The concept is not terrible, a collection of sketch staring the most famous people in all of Hollywood. The cast includes Emma Stone, Richard Gere, Dennis Quaid, Greg Kinnear, Hugh Jackman, Kate Winslet, Seth MacFarlane, Liev Schreiber, Namoi Watts, Anna Farris, Chris Pratt, Jack McBrayer, Justin Long, Uma Thurman and many, many more. However the final product is an unfunny extremely raunchy (as one point the film was given an NC-17 rating) collection of some of the worst moments in Hollywood history. Don’t waste a single moment of your day on Movie 43.

2. The Lone Ranger – A film so bad, so off putting, so confusing that even Depp’s legion of fans didn’t flock to see this. Director Gore Verbinski, Depp and Disney teamed up once to make one of the biggest film franchises of all time (Pirates of the Caribbean) but The Lone Rnager is giant swing and a miss. Long, unoriginal, boring action sequences, terrible direction, actors who are phoning it in, and it’s just plain weird at times The Lone Ranger is a historically bad film. Because of its high profile failure this film will be remembered for its failure for a long time to come, and could end up being a tipping point away from these $300 million films which could end up being a good thing. Somehow Disney bought two Oscar nominations for this film (Hair and Makeup and Visual Effects) that has a 45 minute werewolf subplot cut from it, and until they release that I’m avoiding this 6 time Razzy nominee.

1. The Counselor – blink and you would have missed Ridley Scott’s The Counselor. Starring Michael Fassbender, Penelope Cruz, Javier Bardem, Cameron Diaz, and Brad Pitt and written by the iconic Cormac McCarthy The Counselor is a drag. Illogical, extremely slow, endlessly bleak… this film is a bummer; in every sense of the word. I’d gladly watch any other film this before I’d sit through the Counselor. Scott is clearly trying to work through some personal issues here, but get a counselor not a $25 million budget.